The Jury's Still Out...

I informed my Gastroenterologist ahead of time that I'm claustrophobic and that I have a very low threshold for pain. I even told him twice so that he would understand the brevity of my situation. He understood perfectly and made certain that I had enough sedation to totally knock my lights out. I made certain that he understood that the last time I didn't have enough sedation (during a Gingivectomy)... I grabbed the Periodontists family jewels. His assistants practically had to remove my arm to release my death grip. Embarrassingly enough, they laugh about that to this day. I'm still not laughing and neither was Dr. Patel. He made sure I was heavily sedated. Dear Man.

So... he says he removed *a number* of polyps and also took a tissue sample. I won't find out about the tissue sample until Monday, if not later. Here's The Thing. When I was 34 I was diagnosed with stomach cancer after my G.P. sent me for an upper G.I. I had been throwing up for months & months, so he scheduled me for the Upper G.I. After it was done, I went back to his office and he told me that I had stomach cancer and to get my life in order. My son was 3 years old and my daughter had just turned one.

I called Mr. Snoots from the doctor's office and told him what the doctor had said. He said "Bull Shit!" and called a childhood friend who had returned here to practice internal medicine and I was waiting in his office an hour later. I was shaking and scared, on the verge of completely freaking out as he ushered me into his office. He then proceeded to tell me that there has never been anyone as young as I was, diagnosed with stomach cancer. So, he gave me some heavy drugs, made an appointment for me at the hospital the next day, for a laperoscopy (I think that's what it was called). They started me with an I.V. of Valium and after that I don't remember a thing. As it turned out, I did not, in fact, have stomach cancer. I had huge honking stomach ulcers the size of one's fist, for which I remain on medicine, to this day. Oh Yeah! Can you just see what a relaxed mommy and wife I was now? Uh-Huh.

So, I was just sure that something horrible was going to be found in the colonoscopy... like I really did have stomach cancer after all. However, that being said, I believe that only the good die young. If that's really true, then I guess I'm good to go. I guess I'll find out for sure on Monday. I haven't exactly taken great care of myself over the years, and I've certainly had my fun when I wanted to, so I guess I deserve whatever comes my way. I'm hoping that I've redeemed myself along the way enough to come out of this deal clean. Only time will tell now.

I hate, hate, hate playing the *waiting game*, but clearly, I have no choice. If you feel like tossing a few prayers my direction, it would be greatly appreciated. I'll post again after I hear about the tissue sample results. Until then, my mind is rather preoccupied.

Are we having fun yet?