Thursday, February 4, 2010

I Have A Hypothetical Question For My Blog Buddies... Obviously, I Need Help In Making A Decision

Okay, here's the deal. The same surgeon that performed my Abdominoplasty (tummy tuck) is now offering face lifts with a ten day recovery period. Huh? Yup, TEN DAYS. It's about $5,000.00 and believe me, I'd trust this doctor to the ends of the earth because he is really caring and one of the best in the field of plastic surgery; in these parts anyway. He claims that this new procedure lasts longer and is much safer. It's called a Cranial Suspension Short Incision Face Lift with minimal downtime using local anesthesia. This sounds like just *the ticket* for someone like me who has (after many surgeries) developed a fear of going under the knife. Yes, I think this would be by far preferable to the old *nip and tuck* face lift of days gone by. It's certainly something worth considering. Normally, with all the costs added together a face lift is up around $35,000.00, which is more than I'd ever spend.

Then, a couple of young doctors opened up a practice locally where they offer the latest technology in foot and ankle pain management without needles and drugs, the "Pediatric/Adult Flatfoot Reconstruction", which I didn't even realize existed until now. I'm uncertain as to what it costs, but for someone who has been teased unmercifully about her flat feet for an entire lifetime, I'm thinking this might be like the dream of a lifetime, come true. Frankly, I'd have to see and talk with someone (or several someones) before I ever decided to dive in head first, but just the thought of having arches in my feet makes me totally giddy.

These are the feet I was given at conception and lived with for 57 years. Sometimes they really hurt, having to walk around on my ankles isn't all fun, you know. Sure, I'm a great swimmer, but that is the ONLY advantage to having flat feet.

So, here is my dilemma: Mr. Snoots says I could pick one and have it done, BUT there would be no vacations or trips to see the kids or anything else for a year. Hmmmm... So, speaking hypothetically, would either be worth it? Which one would be more worthy? Having my sagging upper eyelids, under eye bags, sagging jowls and turkey neck fixed or having arches in my feet for the first time in 57 years? Would it be worth only seeing my children at Christmastime? I just don't know. I'm in a complete quandary over this, so I'd appreciate a bit (or a ton) of input here. These are things that really plague and occupy my mind right now but I'm not sure I could stay put for a whole year without seeing my kids or taking a vacation.

Quite obviously, I need help in making a decision and I'm nearly in tears at the thought of having to choose. Any thoughts from anyone? Or experience? Should I just blow them both off and learn to accept my aging process, therefore continuing to take a few vacations every year and see my kids more often? I keep thinking of things like: What if I did one of these, missed seeing my kids, then I have something happen and I die? Would it have been worth it then? Of course not. No one can weigh the pros and cons of a situation better than I... To the point that I cannot make decisions about things of this caliber.

This picture was almost a year ago and it's not getting any better.... I don't want to hear what you think I want to hear. I want to hear what you really think. I can't help but wonder if either procedure is worth the risk.

Any thoughts out there? Clearly, I must trust all of you or I wouldn't be asking, so help me out here. Please? Pretty please?


Writer Chick said...

Not even an issue for me. I earned every one of my wrinkles, sags and bags. I'd never give up seeing my daughter for anything. So you tuck it and suck it, next year something else is going to sag or bag. It's a never ending circle. The feet...that's another story. If you can get comfort, that might be worth looking into. HOWEVER, I'm like you, I'd talk to a million someones before I let someone basically reconstruct my feet. Gimping around is better than not being able to walk because some yahoo screwed you your feet.

Probably not much help, but my two cents.

Writer Chick said...

I meant screwed up your feet not screwed you your feet. That's just plain silly.

Snooty Primadona said...

Well, thank you Writer Chick! I needed an honest opinion & I have to say I agree with you. It would just be so much easier if I could age like Audrey Hepburn or Katherine Hepburn.... I suppose it's really all about how we view ourselves, isn't it? Maybe I can't live with the sags & bags, but I could learn. I think. Maybe.

Anonymous said...

Fix your feet only if you have a lot of pain. If not I would not do either one, I would rather see my kid's often. When I said bye to my son I had no idea that would be the last time I was to see him. He had a accident a day later. Spend as much time with your kid's as you can. That is my take on it anyway.

Snooty Primadona said...

Dee: Thank you so much. You see? This is the kind of thing that would destroy me and I need to come to grips with it. I need to get my priorities straight and I think I'm almost there. I'm so sorry about your son. I understand too, because we almost lost our son to drugs. I'm so sorry & please know that I wasn't just kidding about what I said. It is one of my greatest fears & I'm so sorry it happened to your son & you.

Seriously, does it matter what I look like? Well, not to me. I worry about the hubby because males are such *visual creatures*. No matter how old & saggy they get, they still believe that they are desirable. Why can't we be like that? Apparently, not enough ego to go around.

The only reasom I'm even considering it is so Mr. Snoots will still want to look at me. You know, since men are so easily influenced by the visual side of life. I am not. I actually like the whole picture I see in the mirror. It's him that I worry about. After 32 years of marriage. Go figure.

Anonymous said...

Thank's for your words. Hey, if you are worried about Mr. Snoots just remove all the light bulbs and buy nothing but candles for your house.
I bet you have a lot of things about you that Mr. Snoots love's.

saramosa said...

this is the first time i have read your blog (i linked over here via noble pig) but i think your face looks beautiful. even though you say you trust this doctor you have to remember this would be a procedure, not a scientific method, which means something could go drastically wrong. Never put yourself under the knife for vanity's sake.go spend time with your children
take care ~sarah

Cathy M said...

I'm not a fan of cosmetic surgery, so any kind of facelift would be out. Your feet would be another matter, if they keep you from skiing and playing golf (which I doubt they do), go with the foot surgery. But, it would be best to keep seeing your kids and keep the lights dim.

Queen of Halloween said...

Been lurking for awhile but this is one topic I can't ignore. Changing your looks just to please someone else never works. It will never be enough. You will never be able to change how old you are! Life created your face/body...enjoy the fact you are alive and healthy. If your feet are affecting your health then fix them...if it's vanity, why worry what others think? I believe one should learn to age graciously. If your Mr wants to stray there will be nothing that will stop him other than the threat of the loss of half his earnings! Traveling is never an important enough thing over time lost with your family & friends. Don't fix what isn't broken...;) Great blog by the way!

Staci said...

Just from reading your blog, I KNOW Mr. Snooty loves everything about you, INCLUDING your face (which is beautiful by the way) and your feet (which as you say make you a great swimmer). Having lost both parents as a teenager, it was easy for me to decide. Spend the time with your kids. Spend the money spending time with your kids. Heck, spend the money doing something so crazy that it CAUSES a wrinkle or two! And invite me! And your kids!

Mental P Mama said...

Spend the time with your kids. And when you sell the house and downsize to that adorable townhouse, you will have the dough for the face--if you really think you need it. I don't see it. I think your feet are cute. I have such high arches and insteps that my feet hurt a lot. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. No?

Rian said...

If it were me, I'd do the face. I would be scared to death to have the structure of my feet messed with. That could open up a whole new can of worms.

Sjn said...

I have to agree with QofH above. And that photo of you... gorgeous! You don't have wrinkles or bags girly! You look like a fellow 50 year old, like moi! I understand the sagging upper eyelids, I have them too. I just don't wear any eye shadow, and my glasses hide it. You have to let your eyesight get a tad worse so you can wear glasses and solve that problem right there! Ha!
I won't even do Botox, I'm afraid I'll be the one in a thousand with the allergic reaction.
BTW... I loooove your haircut and color! I love a natural gray, there's no color prettier!

The Incredible Woody said...

I've been thinking about this, trying to answer as if it were me. I think I would be scared of the foot surgery. So I think I would opt for the facelift.

But that said, I think you are beautiful just the way you are:)

Tammy said...

I vote for no facelift... If your feet are giving you a lot of pain go for that surgery because if you are in foot pain that makes vacations and visiting your kids harder. If you think the pain is not too bad, wait. Time spent with your kids or on vacation visiting wonderful places cannot be replaced. You are gorgeous inside and out!

Green-Eyed Momster said...

How about if I get a face lift, you fix your feet and your kids can come visit you? Having flat feet can't be any fun. I say go for it!

Big hugs!

Daryl said...

I think if I was you I would have the flat feet fixed, that has to horrific to walk like that... besides you look great just the way you are! xo

Patricia Hannigan said...

I'm a big evangelist for plastic surgery... and all the injectable enhancers... because the thing is; though we all agree that in an ideal world we should be able to age naturally and feel good about it, the plain truth is that our society puts a huge premium on youthful looks.

Hopefully our friends and family love us for who we are (That sure seems to be your case) and that's awesome. But most of us don't have the luxury to remain in a loving cocoon of family and friends... we're obliged to go out into the world to work, interact, spend time and negotiate with all sectors of society... and that's where we develop this desire to look "better".

Sometimes a "procedure" such as the one of those you outline above can work wonders confidence and mood. It's not the case for everyone... and I admire/envy those who aren't susceptible to such influences... but if you are... if you think about it regularly, it would most likely be a positive step for you AND for your loved ones, because they want to see you happy.

I don't consider myself to be a person who is lacking in self-confidence or susceptible to depression or overly influenced by the opinions of others, but I've had my share of so-called "procedures" and they've always made me feel more empowered, more upbeat and just better.

So, I just wanted to put that side of the coin out there... you're definitely doing the right thing by giving it careful consideration before making any decision. And if you want any additional info about my experiences don't hesitate to send me an email: ;o)

Blarney said...

Okay here's the deal ~if it bothers you every day you look in the mirror, it bothers you every day you look in the mirror.
Not many people I know look at feet other than to comment on the pedi or if there was a foot injury.
I'm dealing with two people down from borken feet. Recovery enough to walk is 6 weeks tops. 6+ weeks of sitting on your a$$ doing not much of anything. What's the recovery from this foot surgery? Can you take the recovery? Can you deal with opening a can of worms by having the surgery on your feet? Get some referals and see what their truths are.
While you are gathering all the referal data I'd get the lift. There is always next year.

kim-d said...

As usual, I got here a day late...but I never miss an opportunity to give my opinion.

First...I love your hair! Second, the foot surgery? Unless you are practically crippled...NO! I've known a lot of people who have had lots of different foot surgeries. They all hurt like hell, took forever to heal, and none of them were glad they did it. Just sayin'. Third, I think you have a lovely face, but if it would make you happy to have a little enhancement, then you should do it, if it is something that you really want. But only if The Mr. is not serious about not seeing your kids (don't say I said this, but that doesn't sound like a condition he would stick to...right?). If he is serious, it's my opinion you should see the kids.

I'll be totally honest with you...if somebody offered me a tummy tuck (after I lose weight), I'd have to tell the kids, "I love ya, but I'll see ya next year!" HAHA! Just joking...maybe. :)

BJ Roan said...

We all want to look our best, but staying young forever won't happen, so I say we should make the best of what we have without risking our lives with unnecessary surgeries. I will admit, it's tempting to have a tuck here and there, but you are the same Snooty inside as you have always been. I would bet money Mr. Snoots sees past those life lines and still sees you as that young woman he fell in love with. And saying all that, if you decide to go ahead with a the pics. ;)

Lyn said...

I keep looking for some sort of super glue that would pick my jowls up and permanently afix behind my ears. Anybody? Just want that jawline back again..who knew that was the real bottom line in aging, not those cute little radiating lines at the corners of my eyes.
Glue, or surgery, only without anesthesia. It's hard to "face" up to it. I'd start at the top and work my way down!

Heather said...

I wrote a comment, I swear I did. Maybe I need a "memory" lift these days.

I recently went to my first "botox" party. It was one of those things I HAD to go to. I was the only one there who hadn't had botox yet and who didn't know what Clarisonic was.

I didn't do or buy anything, but I wanted to. But after the party I was completely obsessed with my "laugh & love" lines. I couldn't stop staring at them. The whole experience made me TOO aware of my "little" signs of aging.

I didn't like be so consumed with how I looked. So I decided to go back to my minimal makeup with some added under-eye cover-up. I'm not saying I'd never do it, but I'm not doing it now.

I chatted with a friend and we both decided we'd rather take a trip to Scotland and golf. As long as I have to decide one thing over the other, I think I will opt for more life experiences rather than erasing the marks of the ones I've had.

BTW, if the feet hurt, definitely fix them.

Diane said...

Well, I nursed K2 through 4 foot surgeries for her horrific bunions. You gotta have good feet to be a nurse. It is a long recovery and that's not just the 6 to 8 weeks that you can't put any weight on your foot, but the special shoes, etc and the year in nothing but athletic shoes... K2 had her heels realigned and arches stabilized so it wasn't just toe surgery.
All that to say, if at 57 you're ready to dedicate that kind of time to recovery, it can be totally worth it. K2 was in a lot pain before hand and it's much better for her now.
On the face... I think you're lovely as you are. But if it would make you feel better, that I support you!

etheljr said...

Any chance your insurance will help with the foot surgery? No way on the lift. See your kids and enjoy a vacation; buy an expensive handbag and a new Clinique lipstick. Works for me! Best wishes.

Sjn said...

so... what have you decided to do???

imbeingheldhostage said...

What?! No way, you are beautiful and aging gracefully-- holy cow, don't you watch Dove commercials? (Do they even have those anymore?). Seriously, I think you are striking and am sure you turn plenty of heads.

TheVinylVillager said...

Snooty...if you must do either, do the feet. It will make a better improvement on your quality of life. You hardly look like you need the facelift yet to me. Having been surrounded by a few women in my life who have been nipped, tucked, sucked, and lifted to the point that they can now blink their assholes, I say give a facelift a few more years before you have it done. Chances are, if you got it now, you may well feel the need for another one in a decade or so, and I have never seen anyone with a second face lift who didnt constantly look like someone had just turned the corner and shouted "Boo!"


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