My Most Recent Blunder... The Fun Never Ends Around Here

It seems I've been talking to myself on this blog as of late. However, that has never bothered me...
much, and it's certainly never stopped me. So, I continue with my mindless babble, perhaps driving away even more readers and the few who have braved making comments. It's okay, really. I understand that it's the busiest time of year for everyone. Fortunately or not, my shopping has been done, the tree has been decorated, the house bedecked with Christmas cheer, and we decided to not send out Christmas cards this year.

Granted, I could be out in the guest house or out at our storage unit... cleaning out years of semi-hoarding, but it's too freaking cold for that. You need to be able to move quickly for that kind of work and layers of clothing doesn't really allow for that kind of industrious labor. That's my excuse and I'm sticking with it.

So, I'll tell you the tale of my latest blunder. Actually, I wasn't going to tell anyone but decided it was too damn funny not to tell anyone and everyone that would listen. We all know I don't have the making-the-tree-lights-work gene from past years, but I'm also
stubborn, which tends to make up for that.

After I rearranged my Christmas tree the other day to accommodate the new ornaments I'd bought, I turned off the lights and happily went to bed and slept with visions of spiked eggnog in my head. Or something like that. The next day at dusk I went to turn on the lights and the entire center section of the tree didn't light up. Wha? There must be at least 600 lights on the stupid tree. You know. At least 6 or so years of throwing on new lights just to avoid this very thing. I was stunned into silence but it didn't last long.

I wanted to throw the tree through the living room windows and be done with it. I was just so frustrated after all the hanging of ornaments, adjusting and tweaking, so tossing it wasn't really an option, just a momentary dark thought. Mr. Snooty wisely chose to stay out of my way. That was Friday night.

Actually, I couldn't imagine Christmas without lights and since I always keep several boxes of new strands of lights, I went to gather them up and head back to the tree where I would tackle the job of adding new lights. I carefully removed all the breakable ornaments and attempted to find the strand that threatened to ruin my Christmas. No luck there but my hands might possibly be scarred for life from the branches.

So I begrudgingly spent most of the day on Saturday taking off ornaments, adding new lights, then once again decorating the tree, but just the mid-section. Still, our tree is 7.5' tall so it was no small fete, I assure you. At last I was finished and as I reached to the back of the tree to hang one last crystal prism, I stepped on something under the tree skirt.

Yes, I stepped on the button that turns those lights back on that I thought were burned out. What a light show it provided! Somehow, I had failed to notice that little button had slipped itself under the tree skirt when I wasn't looking. No, I wasn't drunk although I wish I could say that I was. However, at that point I just went in the kitchen and fixed myself a nice stiff drink and went back to the living room to sip it as I looked upon my glorious light show.

When Mr. Snoots came into the room I told him of my blunder and we both broke into hysterical laughter and toasted to our fully lit tree which now has more than 800 lights on it. It's now more complicated than the New York City subway system. But you should never lose your sense of humor, right?

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all!

The Griswold Party & A West Texas White Christmas...

We almost never have a white Christmas, but this year Mother Nature treated us to a big snow, making everything look like a Christmas card. Yipppeeee!

We trekked through the snow to the Griswold party and boy, were we ever glad we did. It was really a hoot and some of the costumes were hilarious. SD borrowed an ugly Christmas sweater from a relative and and she looked great. We only wore hats because I don't own any ugly Christmas sweaters & Mr. Snoots doesn't even own a sweater. Seriously.

As usual, I said I'd take lots of pictures, which I failed to do except for when we first got there and then when we were leaving the party. I know. But I always just get so wrapped up in talking with people that I just plain forget.

There were lots of men with squirrels pinned to the back of their sweaters, but the best part was the RV they had parked out in front of their house, proclaiming it to be cousin Eddie's travel trailer. They put up lighted palm trees & put out an old club chair and neon pink flamingos as well.

They had the entire roof of their house loaded with lights, just like the Griswold's house in the movie. I mean, this couple was really into it!

We stayed for a couple of hours, then left SD there to party on with her friends, with her friends promising to bring her home later. So, I received a call from SD around Midnight and had to venture out in the snow to fetch her ( but this seems to happen every year and I'm always happy to rescue my babies).

 
 






We were trying to remember when we last had a white Christmas, all of us certain that it had been many years ago. Our memories are obviously failing us. The last White Christmas was in 2009.......

Well, Merry Christmas To Me & To You All...

This morning I received *the call* from the doctor who did my colonoscopy. The nurse told me everything was perfect and they want to see me again in 5 years. Woot! Woot! Always good to know, right? I have mild Diverticulitis, which is not a big deal if I increase the fiber in my life. So. Can. Do.




So, I think I'm all ready for Christmas and the *in-laws* on the 27th. I'm so excited I can hardly wait! It's going to be like an extra Christmas for me. Yeehaaaaaw!




Our son hasn't been looking very hard for a job and I suspect that he just wants to come home while his cousins are here. If he gets a job now, that wouldn't be possible, but I understand and I'm okay with that.

On the 22nd is the Debutante Presentation at The Petroleum Club ( which we declined this year). Mr. Snoots usually agrees to attend for the sole purpose of lingering over the bottomless bowl of fried quail, while I'm usually at the smoked salmon buffet. It's always the best party in town at Christmas, but I decided to decline the day after my bone grafts for tooth implants, which might have been a bit hasty. I hate missing those festivities. Seriously.

SD will be home Friday, which is the day we are to attend the Clark Griswold party at a friend's home in the evening. What fun that promises to be! The last party they had was a *Disco Down* Christmas party, dressed in full 1970's garb, with literally hundreds of people in attendance. What a hoot this couple is! I'm taking the digital camera this year and getting pictures. It's all just too good to pass up, really. I know. I'm shameless when it comes to obtaining blog fodder.




In addition to this, it looks to be smooth sailing from here, on in to the New Year. It makes me feel so blessed. I'm so thankful for every single thing in my life.


Merry Christmas To All...

Christmas Tree Bling... And A Colonoscopy Cocktail!

Yes, I've lost my mind ever since I figured out I could fill in all the gaping holes in the tree with Christmas bling! Duh. So, I went to Michaels Arts & Crafts again today and bought some more of that bling for 70% off, which might actually be closer to what this stuff is worth. 





Unfortunately, they barely had anything left. In the last two days the place has literally been cleaned out. Wah. Still, I was able to snatch up some great deals, although not as many as I'd hoped for. You see, once I develop a *bug* for something I want it all then, but I didn't properly estimate the amount I needed, as if I could have. I also wanted more ribbon for the tree but it was all gone as well. Note to self: Next time just go ahead and buy all of the ribbon and all of the bling the first time you go to Michael's.



Luckily, I'm loving the results and I'm wondering why I've never tried this before? Can we spell *R-U-T*? Oh yes we can! But, that spell has now been lifted. Yippeee!

So, I tweaked the tree when I got home, before Mr. Snoots could see that I'd done anything new (sometimes he does take notice). I also did ribbon on the two rather pathetic front porch trees, which makes them look far more presentable and festive. 

All of the presents are wrapped, the goodies for friends & family are in their assigned bags & adorned with more bling, and may the holiday festivities begin! Oh. Wait. We declined all of the parties because of my bone grafts. However, we didn't decline one particular party, so we're going.

How am I celebrating? I'm having a colonoscopy on Wednesday. Please, don't be jealous. Frankly, I couldn't weasel out of it any longer and our insurance deductible of $5,000.00 was already met, so it's the perfect time, right? During the holidays while I still have missing teeth? Nothing makes you want to party more than a colonoscopy and missing teeth, let me tell you! I even bought a party hat for the occasion. I think it might even be a *fascinator*, but it surely looks like a hat that one of the Whos would wear in "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas". Actually, we're going to a Clark Griswold Christmas party on the 23rd, so I bought 2 of them for SD & myself, then one like Clark's for Mr. Snoots. It ought to be great fun as long as the colonoscopy turns out alright, or even if it doesn't. At this point, I don't care who sees the gaping Grand Canyon holes in my mouth. I need contact with people. In fact, I'm craving it.



Anyway, I finished the outside lights as well, with the help of Mr. Snooty this year. He kept asking why I never let him help , so I finally told him, as gently as I could. He always just wants to throw them up, helter skelter, and I want them hung right. So, this year he was as patient as a Zen master. I kid you not. The Magic of Christmas never ceases to amaze me. I'll give you a thrilling glimpse of those outside decorations after I have my colon invaded. Mkay?




Our painter still hasn't gotten around to painting the front door (or any of the other three doors) but I pleaded with him to get it painted before Christmas or I'll do it myself. I'm not sure why he looked horrified. He knows I've painted it the last 3 times and it looked perfect. He said he'd have to take the door off the hinges to paint it and I said, "I. Don't. Think. So. I never had to." That is totally ridiculous and I won't allow it.


As it turns out, Mr. Snoots told him to work outside today since it was up in the 60's. Not my choice, but apparently there were priorities I was unaware of, like building a shed over the new water well pump before it freezes again. Okay, I can can deal with that. Then I walked into SD's the guest room and saw this mess, nearly swallowing my tongue. It was just fine before but evidently Mr. Snoots felt as if something that wasn't broken, needed to be fixed. Mr. D-I-Y-er himself. Whatever. It still looks like this as I write. Evidently, none of this is within my control so I give up. For now. Check with me after my *procedure*.






Our sons bathroom no longer has a leak but it's all still a mess. I tried to get the room cleaned up today but there is a lot to be done & difficult to do alone with a bad back. Yes, I put my back out during my decorating frenzy.



Furthermore, I don't care to have a worker in the house when I'm preparing for the colonoscopy. Is that unreasonable? I. DON'T. THINK. SO. Jeez, I want my privacy.



How am I ever going to find time to do the counter top if the painter never leaves????? Hello! And what about those new windows we were supposed to get this year, with a compensation refund from the government? So. Didn't. Happen. Mr. Snoots wants Mr. Molasses to do it, so we might be moving by the year 2014, maybe later. That is, if I'm still alive by then. 


The louvered closet doors are still gritty and missing paint in spots, but apparently that's not an immediate concern to anyone but me. This is just one of four bedrooms, people. Okay, perhaps we'll be ready to move by 2015. I might shoot myself before then. (Just kidding.)


Actually, I'm truly thankful for everything I have this year so I vow to quit whining. Your. Welcome.


Merry Christmas!

We're Wearing Sandals & Shorts For Christmas This Year... Argh

Yes, it's all too true. Here it is just days away from when Santa is supposed to bring his sleigh and I shudder to think what he'll be wearing this year. It has been in the high 70's for the last week but today it is 87 and predicted to be perhaps 90 tomorrow.

Normally, you run around wishing everyone a Merry Whatever with ruddy cheeks and a chilly rosy nose, with the spirit of the holidays just oozing from your pores (well, I do anyway). I suppose this year I should go out and lay in the sun for that bit of color. I'm not quite sure what to do about that warm, Christmas-y feeling, because it just seems to be absent this year. However, being West Texas, our weather is always subject to immediate and drastic change, just like any other place, I surmise.

It's not that I have too much to do because other than cooking Christmas Eve Dinner, I am done. Even down to the centerpiece on our dining table. Unfortunately, I still can't seem to take a straight or focused picture. Must be the heat. This heat wave is killing me and I've been far too busy to play golf in all this gorgeous weather. Wah. 



Last year at this time it was freezing cold, which just seems to me, as it should be. How can I wear my favorite red sweater if it's 87 outside? How can we possibly gather by the fire to watch "Miracle On 34th Street" or "Christmas Story" in this heat? Well, I'll tell you how.

It's called air conditioning. I plan to crank that sucker down and enjoy *my* Christmas, no matter the cost...


Unfortunately, it looks as if we'll be canceling our Mom/Daughter ski trip this year. The ski area we go to in New Mexico is only 11% open and I assure you that's a stretch and it was 57 degrees F at the bottom of the mountain today. *sigh*. We don't have the time to make Taos or Colorado because daughter will need to get back to hit the books at the law library. We were just going to make a quickie 3 day trip. Oh well. Perhaps Spring Break will be good snow, if she can steal the time...

 
If you'd like to learn how to make the Sheet Music Christmas Trees, then click here for the tutorial OR here to see how Martha does it. I made one (shown in the first picture) and gave to a pianist friend of mine, who just loved it! He couldn't wait to get home and put it on his new Steinway, which made me smile.

Here's hoping everyone has their shopping done with families beginning to gather close. Our little nucleus of a family is almost gathered and the presents are wrapped. I wish all of my blogger buddies a wonderful and happy holiday, but most of all... just to be politically incorrect... MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL. Let us not forget what Christmas is really all about...

So, we're off to dinner with our wonderful daughter...

The Holidays Always Remind Me Of How Forgetful I've Become...

After tying my poor brain into knots trying to remember how I rigged up all the outside lighted garlands and wreaths last year, I've had to step away and take a breath. Am I now going to have to leave myself notes so that I can remember how I performed simple tasks the year before? This is just so pathetic. I'm not that old! Really, I'm not!



Yesterday I went to my Butler's Pantry (all the drawers and cabinets have dead bolt locks and are lined in pacific cloth) to get out my sterling and silver plated ornaments and all of the boxes were empty. Huh? Ohhhh, that's right! I had some brainiac idea about them last year. Since I couldn't remember what genius idea that was, I started searching. I finally found them in another locked drawer, in plastic freezer bags with 3M protective strips. Apparently, last year I decided they were better off in baggies. I wish I'd remembered to remind myself. Or. Leave. A. Note. For. Myself.



There is also another box (God knows where) that contains my most favorite ornaments, many of which were my in-laws' vintage ornaments, among others. Evidently, I decided I needed to put them someplace so safe no one would ever find them. Not even me. I've searched everywhere and am tired of searching (it's been 3 weeks since I started looking). I give up, which means I should find them sometime around Christmas, or after. Or maybe never.



It's certainly not fun watching myself lose my mind. In fact, it's rather painful. Yes, this is when a sense of humor really helps.



However, I am finally, at long last, mostly ready for Christmas. Today the housekeeper came, so I made good use of her being here. This year, she is having to work hard for the amount I pay her per week, not to mention that Christmas bonus. Still, I worked way harder than she did, I assure you. Well, maybe. We might have been more neck 'n neck, really.



Today, I've been at it since 7:00 AM and I've managed to make some serious progress. The outside lighted garlands are up, as are the front door wreath and the lighted wreath on the dining room window. (No, it still isn't lighting up because I hung the garlands backwards & don't want to take them down and do them right.) I cleaned out a lot of the stacks of *stuff* I've been accumulating everywhere and managed to send the housekeeper home with a huge load of *stuff* I just decided wasn't worth keeping. She was absolutely thrilled. I even managed to find a few stocking stuffers for her kids, leftover(and never used) from days gone by. The tree is finally finished, although lacking some of my favorite ornaments.



The Santa Claus collection and the snow globe collection are done as well. I even went so far as to go ahead and set the table for Christmas Eve dinner, although that might be a bit risky, given our mischievous cat, Trouble. I have no doubts that she'll be up on the table checking everything out and trying to get rubs off the crystal stemware. I'll probably have to put those back in the china cabinet until Christmas Eve.




Unfortunately, I still don't have the canned Chow-Chow or the canned hot sauce wrapped up, bagged with bows, and ready to go. That's a huge part of getting ready for Christmas for me. I also don't have our 80 Christmas cards ready to send out yet, but I'm close. The envelopes are stuffed with the picture/cards and the back flap embossed with our name and return address. I just need to run to Office Depot for mailing labels and then to the post office for Christmas stamps.


I also haven't done any shopping for our big dinner, but it's a bit too soon for that anyway. Besides, I can surely bribe one of the young adult offspring to go for me. Sweet.



I've gotten the kids Shrines rooms freshened up and cleared of my clutter. They always appreciate that. I had all my scrap-booking *stuff* spread out in The Daughter's room (still with no progress... I'm so the expert procrastinator!) as well as Christmas storage boxes. In The Son's room, I had my ironing board, the pile of wrinkled laundry, and a few boxes, which have now magically disappeared (for the holidays, anyway).



And, what am I doing? Uh-Huh. I'm talking to my friends, on my blog. I needed a break and this is it folks. I'm taking my break with you all. Frankly, This is absolutely the best place to unwind and relax...It's beginning to look a lot more like Christmas now.



I think I've at long last come to the conclusion that I should learn to live with less *stuff*. Life could be so simple and I keep complicating things with all this chaotic clutter ....

I'm Starting A New Christmas Tradition...

Now that the craziness of the holidays is mostly over, I realize that I'm not yet ready to put away the Christmas decorations. I mean, I feel like I just finished putting them up, right? I did just finish getting them up. In my quest to keep them up longer, I'm instigating the tradition of Twelfth Night. This way, I can stretch out Christmas for another week. Eureka! I don't know why I haven't ever thought of this before.

Considering the fact that our tree stayed in the living room for 3 years, I'd say there's no harm in pretending that we celebrate Christmas until Twelfth Night, which is the Fifth of January. If anyone dares to inquire as to why our tree is still up, I will flash them a huge smile and make my case for Twelfth Night.

Normally, we only use the good china, crystal, and silver on Christmas Eve, but I'm thinking it would be fun to use it all again before it gets put away for another year. What good is it to have these things if you never use them?

We used to have a huge Christmas party every year, which I loved doing, but we stopped having it the year Mr. Snooty's parents both died from cancer. Later, I started having a New Year's Eve party every year but the attendance was never very good so we stopped having that as well. Now, I usually go outside at Midnight and do my big sparklers and set off a few small fireworks. All. By. Myself. It sounds kind of crazy, doesn't it?

So, this year I think I'll have a dinner party the Saturday after New Year's, with just a few close couple friends. I'll make an elegant dinner with some kind of delectable dessert, as we all reminisce about the passing year and speculate about the year to come. I'm thinking we'll have a Prime Rib Roast, grilled tomatoes, salad, garlic roasted potatoes with rosemary, and garlic bread. For dessert I think I'll make Raspberry Neapolitans, which are to die for. This sounds like a much better idea than going out New Year's Eve and feeling like warmed over Hell the next day. We're all getting too old to do much more of that craziness.

Oh Dear! Am I actually beginning to sound like the old fart I'm becoming? Say it ain't so, Joe. Say it ain't so!

What Did You Get For Christmas?

I must admit that I got way more than I ever deserved this year for Christmas, but I'm keeping it all.

Mr. Snoots showered me with gifts this year. First there was this wonderful Food Saver that I've wanted for years. Not only will it keep food fresh longer, but it will also allow more space in the freezer. I love it! Even though it plugs into an outlet, which is certainly a husband to wife gift *No-No*.



Mr. Snoots also gave me two (yes, two!) gift cards to Stein Mart, which is my favorite place to shop for clothes and shoes and decorative items. I can now get an entirely new wardrobe, but I'll probably use it slowly, like I always do. Adding pieces to my wardrobe that I really like & will play well with the other items in my closet.



He also gave me a gift card to Starbucks, which is amazing since he refuses to drink a cup of coffee that costs more than a dollar. Personally, I adore Starbucks.



Next, our son gave us a new DVD player for our HDTV in the kitchen, plus some great movies to watch. We love it!


Then, our daughter gave me two new cookbooks that I've been wanting for a reaaaalllly long time. I wanted a new Joy Of Cooking to replace my old dingy one that is 31 years old.




She also gave me a hardback edition from the editors of Cooks Illustrated called The New Best Recipe, which is outstanding!



Soooo.... what did you get for Christmas? I'm dying to know!


I'm also thankful for many things this year. I'm thankful my daughter is still alive and wasn't killed by a blood clot in her leg. (I'm also kind of wishing that her doctor in California soon gets a blood clot in his leg that goes undiagnosed. Okay, not really.) I think we dodged a huge bullet there. I'm also thankful to have a son who made a comeback from the dark side of drugs and has been clean for two whole years. God has blessed us over and over again and I am forever thankful and grateful.

Christmas And Hospitals Just Don't Go Well Together....

As you know, our daughter came home on crutches due to an ankle injury. Yesterday, she went to my orthopedic surgeon who promptly sent her to the hospital for more x-rays because he thought the pain she has was caused by a blood clot. Sure enough, at the hospital, they told her she did indeed have a blood clot. Then, we had to get her in to see our wonderful GP doctor. She was still at his office at 6:30 PM. He then told her that he wanted her in the hospital so they could give her the Hepacin or Heparin or whatever the heck it's called (blood thinner) through an IV. We were so lucky that he is on call for the holidays.

The sad thing is that she cannot eat anything high in potassium, which translates to NO pumpkin pie, no twice baked potato casserole, and no alcohol. I can't begin to tell you how thrilled she is about all this. I just keep telling her that she's lucky to be alive at this point. While I'm sure she doesn't want to hear it, that is the reality of it.

So, by 7:30 PM she was safely ensconced at the hospital, in a private room no less. The tears began. She was not happy. Mainly because last night was the big costume party, which we all missed. But, that's life, isn't it? She probably would have gone to the party if she had not been admitted to the hospital, so I personally feel that it was a good thing. If the blood clot had dislodged it could have killed her, which is something a bullet proof 23 year old finds difficult to believe.

While Mr. Snoots was busy getting our daughter checked into the hospital I drove out to the airport to fetch elder son. Once I had collected him, we went up to the hospital to see the daughter. She was, of course, throwing a fit over being there so I had to tell her to *can it*. Which she cannot do (oh dear, she really is too much like me). Perhaps she has my claustrophobia issues as well.

Sometime before she graduated from college, Snooty Daughter learned that she she could cry and throw fits to get her way, which works a great deal of the time (not with us though). However, it did not work this time. She called this morning wanting to come home (hey, it's Christmas Eve, right?) and crying. We told her that she could not leave until the doctor releases her. Hello. It's been that way since the beginning of time.

So, then our wonderful doctor called and said he was ready to release our baby. He gave instructions to go by his office and pick up the prescription, then get it filled at Wallgreen's. We will probably see her sometime late this afternoon. Wallgreen's takes their sweet time and is always backed up on filling prescriptions. I have a good friend who is a nurse that is going to come by and give SD the shots (in her stomach, no less). I can't do and I know she can't. God knows Mr. Snoots can't either.

The thing I'm really angry about is the fact that her idiot doctor in California dropped the ball completely. She could have died and he should have known there was something going on with her having so much pain. At the very least, he should have given her a *boot cast*, which she finally got yesterday from my orthopedist. This girl has the highest threshold for pain of anyone I've ever known. Anyway, now she has to find another doctor out in L.A. and our doctor didn't have anyone he could suggest (I honestly thought they all knew each other). So, if anyone knows of a good GP in L.A. please let me know. I don't want her going to another crackpot.

So, she must have two shots of Hepacin every day and on Friday she has to go have more blood work done and then see our doctor again. Fun, fun, fun till the Doctor took her freedom away....

Anyway, I hope everyone is having a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS and avoid blood clots at all costs!

'Twas The Night Before Christmas... Snooty Style

I wrote this last week and thought it was kind of fun...

'Twas the night before Christmas
When All through the house
Not a soul was stirring
Not even a grouch.
The stockings were hung
Where the fireplace should be
In hopes that St. Nicholas surely would see
The muffins we'd left for him with some hot tea.
The children were grown but asleep in their beds
As thoughts of free maid service danced about in their heads.
With Pappy in his room and I in mine
We had just polished off a good bottle of wine.
When up on the roof there arose such a fuss
As the noise tumbled, hit the proverbial dust
I leaped from my sleep with eyes open wide
And peeked out the window to see what was outside
The moon made the desert look covered in snow
And allowed me to see what had fallen below
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a big fat limo with my blog friends standing near.
The driver bore an uncanny resemblance
To a guy I once knew who had driven an ambulance.
More rapid than fruit flies, his vixens they came
As he whistled & coaxed them & called them by name.
On Tammy, On Lauren, On Jeri & Treasia!
On Diane, On Janie, On Cathy & Felicia!
To the top of the porch, bouncing off of the walls,
Now dance away, dance away, dance away all!
As dry skin that past forty will certainly fly
When met with an obstacle like waddles or eyes.
So off to the week-long spa we soon flew
With a limo full of Botox and St. Nicholas too.
And then through giggling I heard them all shout
"Get your ass down here, Snooty. We're all going out."
As I drew in my hand and was turning around
I noticed a lasso that St. Nick had thrown down.
"Grab on and hold tight" I heard him cry
So, I squeezed my eyes closed & held on for dear life.
When at last I was out with nary a tether
I realized my friends were all talking on Twitter.
Santa had a broad face and long tall legs
With a cowboy hat sitting on top of his head.
This can't be an elf, my friends & I said.
"I'm Santa's first helper" the driver said then
Stroking the hair on his chinny chin chin.
I'm here to take you and make you anew
It's what you wished for, every one of you.
He spoke not a word as we flew through the night
We twisted and turned and then took a right.
He soon dropped us off at The Golden Door spa
Where we all giggled and Ooo'd and Ahhhh'd.
With a wink and a nod, off he flew in a flash
Saying "Don't worry ladies, you won't need any cash!"
And in the distance we could just barely hear
As he wished us "Merry Cristmas and Happy New Year"!

Could this be the new face of Santa? Mmmrrrrowwww!

Christmas Goodies, Snooty Style....

Once I'm finished decorating for Christmas, it's time to move on to gift wrapping and getting the gift bags ready. I have a lot to do because I give it to just about everyone on God's Green Earth. Okay, in our town, anyway. Around 45 bags with 2 jars each, to be exact.

I do 12 bags of jam and Chow-Chow for family, 16 for friends, my 3 favorite postal workers, the lady that sprays our house for bugs, our mail lady, our wonderful housekeeper, the man that mows the yard, the four guys in the golf shop at our club, as well as the bartenders at the club. I've got to keep them happy, right? Oh, then I also give a bag to five of my neighbors, including the alien across the street. I also keep a few extras on hand for when people stop by and shower us us with unexpected gifts. It could happen! I also make gift cards like these to mark the gift bags.


Every year I enjoy making something homemade and can it myself, to be given away as Christmas presents. This year, I made my popular Spiced Peach Jam and my Green Tomato & Habanero Chow-Chow, mostly in pint jars with some half-pints and some quart jars thrown in. ;-) I like to keep gifts simple and limited to something that will be used and/or heartily devoured. I also add a little ornament that can be kept as a memory and be tied onto the wrapping for the goodies.

I shop the sales after Christmas and haunt the dollar stores in search of Christmas bags, tissue paper and ribbon, so I won't have to do it before Christmas. Besides, when you shop the sales and the dollar stores year around, you save a ton of money!

I put a lot of care and love into making my jam, just as I do with making the Kahlua and the Chow-Chow. Sure, it would be infintely easier to go and buy something, but I do this because I guess I feel like I'm sharing a part of me with those that I care about most. If that sounded sappy, then it's true.

It isn't necessary to adorn the gifts with pretty packaging. I do it because I like pretty wrappings. It shows that I've gone the extra mile to make my present look nice. When I should have been cleaning house, doing laundry, or some other mundane task. That's no fun. I'd rather decorate Christmas gift bags. Just remember that, if you ever get to see the inside of my house.

So, this is what my my dining room table looks like right now. It's insanity in progress, but somehow I manage to get all of it done before Christmas.

Did I mention how dirty cluttered my house is? Aaaaaaargh!